06/30
-visited my homies and we watched halik sa hangin. which is way better than mallari (i got so dissatisfied with it last weekend)
-dinner with fam and this time with kuya carlo. its a beautiful sunday, perfect morning sunshine. kuya talk about his interest in helping me finance my Europe trip of which i am super touched. had a lovely day with mama, jesse, and baby avvy..
-meet chai and this time we had coffee at nomu. we walk in the rain while we talk about augmented realities in the abandoned houses and the kalayaan residence/dorm
we laugh our heart out with all the make up stories we can think of.
also mentioned with her lsst night how i end up my night sleeping instead of further partying.. how my root chakra got so activated, my sakral, my heart , my throat were so ignited but my crown chakra told me, enough ur tired. such damper..
-felt overwhelmed with joy with family and friends. just want to savor it in bed. i end up not attending the queer party in qc memorial circle and not able to meet jazel and lala
-listened to Norwegian wood spanish version
06/29
-watched spark camp season 2!
-reunion with dale, gab, lanis and lem at Art Understand (ian's 2nd solo exhibit)
-meet interesting artists, tessa, philline, and the shibari girl)
-while lem and i talk over drinks, approach this guy named Dash Araya. interesting get up and he is my type. we talk and he joined in our conversation. we already got drunk and he mentioned about going to Danza rave party. wss torned between going with him or to Gab's event at aphotheka and i end up going home to sleep 😅
06/25-28
-almost lost my wallet in UPTC (IC che's gift) good thing my closed colleagues help me find it and we were able to retrieve it from the trabahante inside the mall compound
-got my first NPS promoter snf it was also first for our batch. got incentive out from it
-bond with Rhoda and she shared her usual pandesal and barley. surprisingly it takes like matcha
-drowned with billie eilish new album: hit me hard.
played it constantly on spotify
my top favorite tracks are: blue, birds of a feather, chihir
06/24
-felt my social battery replinished and activated
-vcall with maxie bella and listen to her week long vacay in siargao
-also got excited with her plans going to Germany. Life is indeed so exciting
-re intouch with myself with long walks and some sunshine around UP campus
06/23
-finally "re intouch" with chai after several months. she is in her "re intouch" moment with her arnis stance after several years of not doing it.
-bond with her mother, tita Virginia. from vera's tita Adelia, to russ' tita Elvira, i have been a full pledge known best friend to my best friends' moms. such a wonderful feeling
-so here we go again with her lengthy ruminifications and perspective shifting.
-gifted chai the book i had from sta. fe: South American mythologies
-have a quick bonding with fam over dinner and mallari
got bored with it eventually and not able to finished it.
06/22
-realized that homogenic was conceived in malaga where i will be assigned.
tell russ about it. im super excited
-saw a firefly once again.. first
time for this year! after a long dry spell of el nino
-walk and sing under the rain. savor every drop. the scent of wet earth, the breeze, thunder and the downpour.. will definitely miss this as spain rarely rains
-went to qc memorial for the qc pride. unfortunately it was cut short due to heavy rain
saw some casualties who are shivering inside the emergency tents. i hope they will be ok
-the guard wont allow me to enter as it was cancelled but i want to get in and see ut for myself. walk around qc circle and simply reminisce the grandness of last year. at least i saw the stage up close the tower, BINI (supposedly featured artist)
and the fireworks that were not able to spark up the night. saw it cancelled with my very eyes.
-went to the world peace bell ..it remind me of the first spot where i arrived here in qc way back in 2010. while resting i replay the highlights of my years from 2010 to 2024 here in qc (with a intermittent pause in 2015 and 2018 when i wenr ro cebu.
-so long QC, i will surely miss u
06/19
-finally watched the bangla film fest entry: "rickshaw girl"
one of the most beautifulovie. ive seen this year so far
-i love how it resolves pain and misery with fantasy and still able to live the protagonist dreams. very palpable and plausible.
-also love the scene where naima cried on top of the unfinished bldg saying its beautiful view from the top but its so ugly down below, then the secguard just simply told her not for the people who found their purpose, as they see they see the beauty in the ugly.
06/16
-attended the co-love workshop by jazel kristin and shogo kubota: stop, move and listen at syquia
see instagram posts
06/15
-bond with rhoda in qc memorial circle. wonderful catch up
06/12-13
-invited chai for the co-love workshop with jazel and shogo
i prepped her much so she can say yes. both of us needs healing so it's wonderful if we can attend this together.
-woke up rather late for my trinity me time moment (facial, haircut massage) and too late for a korean film showing so i end up getting back to where i left of ( past mid part ) rereading Murakami's Norwegian wood and was struck with tears and amusement with Midori's narrative. she is hell of interesting character.
06/11
-so i have this colleague who is now on his 40s and he said he was never got any partner snf never been devirginized. he kind of remind me of joshua bautista (older version) of which i can only advice to seize the day, the life to its fullest
well it's never too late..
- now im musing with the idea of how wonderful it is to have sex during my mid 20s to mid 30's
although i pinpoint there are 10 significant guys whom i dated since my breakup with Julio, guys who i cried over or got emotionally affected. so not a bad and not boring lufe at all.
-there was a workshop done in our training about "how you want other people perceive about you" and it's weird i had a hard time writing about it since i really don't give a damn about other about at all.. i mean it doesn't mean i didn't care but i guess what really matters is your notion of self worth. and and im not a person who mull it over so much about others impressiln about me. maybe the people pleaser in me already died thousand of years ago. but one thing i wrote that surprises me and the impression i want to leave to other people is this: im a collaborator and not a competitor.
06/10
-finally done with my laundry
2 months worth 😅
-watched russ' Pluto. was mesmerized with its meditative effect/affect
-watched the rain outside my window, overlooking a mini rain forest. it is such a beautiful scene. i will definitely missy boarding house here in UP campus.
-bathe in the rain and simply drench myself with bliss
-at peace and filled with joy as im writing all these, i am reminded its not about how many films youve watched, novels youve read.. but how you experience your day unravel.
revisit your past and realized how amazing your life is more than you'll ever know.
06/08-09
-got anxiety attacks
-was picking my face too much, and found out it was linked to my anxiety 😅
-my funds were completely diminished and my loan application inq with my new payroll account with bpi is not viable.
-during these challenging times i realized who are those people/friends i can count on
-went to pasig and take refuge with my fam.
-russ shared a performance excerpt and asked for pluto as im craving for more artistic doze
-im so grateful and blessed to have my family specially in these times of stress.
-food trip at home, kulitan eith avvvy. video call with xin2x snf leanne and let them know me and mamu will be visiting them in Cebu this coming September
-chat with mamu and im excited for her hometown trip in samar. so proud of her newly built house and piglet for their upcoming town fiesta.
-movie marathon, shark in Paris, and rewatched gulliermo del torro's mama.
06/05-07
-received my region assignment and it will be in Andalucia!
-although i was wishing it will be madrid but Andalucia is definitely not a lesser region.
-started watching videos about Andalucia and can't help but marvel the possible places i can visit; the arts and the culture i can immerse in.
-enjoying my training, specially for the english language review, this will definitely come in handy for my future language assistant program in spain.
06/04
-reread murakami's Norwegian wood. i don't know how to put it in words but i am now shifting my perspective from the younger protagonist to the middle age characters.
for example, in this scenario, i, i read it when i was in my early 20's so i had my perspective with toru and naoko. but this time, since i am now on my late 30's, i can sense how it to be like reiko.
just like in the book: sputnik Sweetheart. i can sense how it to be like miu, more than ever before. i love how i am shifting or rather up gearing my perspective from one age group to another.
-now, i have this itch to go back to my 20's self, so i reread my journal entries by then, this was summer almost 2 decades ago:
https://hotmug.blogspot.com/2005/05/?m=0
and i found what i am afraid of
losing: that sense of wonderment and the novelñty of everyday surprises.
06/03
-watched and listen with intention to dr. Wendy suzuki's insights on how to take care of ur brain and the wisdom our strong emotions deeply seated
in our brain:
https://youtu.be/5o-tRub-0pQ?si=-7baSug0tglw10IP
-was struck with her view on spirituality and the profound depth of grief means/equates to a profound love.
06/01-02
-spent my weekend with theo, in sta rosa laguna. met him 7 years ago? in a pnp session. then had a short, fleeting romance with him when we were so young and immature.
now he is very financially stable and capable. but i don't know, it totally doesn't work
as it appears i know what i don't want (as i just got fazed out with some of his haburs, character, etc) for example his sedentary lifestyle, his craze over whamo's Toro's family reality show , but i don't really know what i really want from a person. might as well end up as an old maid.
-still able to spend good times with him though, watched the alas filipas tournament vs Australia and india with his 65inch hdtv in between sex
, coffee and meals
-was upfront with him with my plans going to spain, so that also made him faltered in a way. i think that's all there is tp it.
-test the movie buff in me had had two 2.5 length movies:
*under the silver globe
*Schindler's list
such a marathon
